Sunday, December 10, 2006

The Great FOB Gift Exchange

WHEREAS the Fobsters are flung wide throughout the country, following their own muses and making their own messes (which they will clean up when they're done with them, thank you very much); and

WHEREAS this holiday season is a time when people remember those whom they love, including self-described egoists, medaevalists, and hymenealists; and

WHEREAS the combined FOB love each other, up to but not including Jeph, whose appearance in the FOB Pantheon was for the sole purpose of acting as a foil, anyway;

THEREFORE, Tolkien Boy (hereafter referred to as "the party of the first part") proposes that during the Christmas Season (being technically the period between midnight on Thanksgiving Day and midnight on December twenty-fifth, but lasting "all year" according to some country-western songs) the FOB united (hereafter referred to as "the kickin' parties of the second part, who sound eerily like a aeronautics industry") focus those energies not wrapped up in buying gifts for family members and friends (hereafter referred to as "those parties which are never as fun as FOB parties, somehow") in providing gestures of goodwill to other FOBsters via the Internet. Thus,


1. All "gifts" must be able to be posted on the FOBlog. This can include accolades, reminisces, your-mom jokes, pictures, poetry, short works of fiction, and what-have-you.

2. Anyone who can post on the FOBlog can participate.

3. Anyone who can post on the FOBlog should participate.

4. No one should be left out.* If the moderators feel that someone is being left out, the party of the first part will write a stinging rebuttal.

5. If Theric and Tolkien Boy are the only ones who contribute, Tolkien Boy will seriously consider getting a joint blog with Theric and giving up on the FOBlog. No stress.

6. References to the word "moist," "pelvis," and "lumpenproletariat" will make the party of the first part shudder.

7. Humorous renditions of the "12 Days of Christmas" are not welcome.

*The moderators realize that some of the FOB do not read the FOBlog. It is okay to leave these B.A.'s out, as they are a disgrace to FOBdom.


Blogger B.G. Christensen said...

How about non-humorous renditions?

12/10/2006 5:10 PM  
Blogger Kari said...


Five Golden Fobs!

Four Calling Fobs, Three French Fobs, Two Turtle Fobs and a FO-O-Ob in a Fob Tree!

...would not be acceptable? That's a darn shame.

12/11/2006 6:29 AM  
Blogger Melyngoch said...

Also five gold your moms? For calling your moms? Ooooh, three French your moms?

12/11/2006 1:46 PM  
Blogger Melyngoch said...

(the above demonstrates that I can't spell. but I'ue ben reading Middle English for ten hours a dei three days in a rouwe, so it's nogt my fawlte.)

12/11/2006 1:47 PM  
Blogger Th. said...


I am thinking.

12/11/2006 10:16 PM  
Blogger Th. said...



12/11/2006 10:16 PM  
Blogger Christian said...


I wouldn't say that you can't spell. I would say that you have offered a unique interpretation of the lyrics, even if they are idsjointed from the overall theme of the lyrics. You see, I read it as follows:

Five gold your moms? Why? Well, for calling your moms, silly. That's why you have five gold your moms.

12/12/2006 12:40 PM  
Blogger Th. said...


That's what I thought it was in the first place.

12/16/2006 11:08 PM  

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